This Too Shall Pass

Sometimes I wish I was more thick-skinned. Sometimes I wish I didn’t care and that all the decisions I make do not affect me. But there are instances in life when you have to take responsibility, do what duty calls and stand up for what you believe is a right decision. This is what growing up means. Facing life’s difficulties and making difficult decisions.  Even if sometimes making difficult decisions would bring about ugly, nasty feelings.  You feel like being in a pit of mixed emotions from regret to resolve, from anger to sadness and then to affirmation.  These are feelings you wish you could do without. And no matter how you wish you won’t feel these crazy emotions, they settle right there at the pit of your stomach. All comfortable and gearing in to make you feel, absolutely miserable..

All I could do is pray. Pray to help me get through this.  Pray that I accept that it’s all part of what life throws at me. 

Pray that this too shall pass. Soon.

Moments in Portraits II - March 24, 2009

Sleep evaded me last night. I found myself turning in at around 2:30 in the morning. Thus, it is not surprising that I practically dragged myself out of bed. 

I looked at the clock in the kitchen…8:00 am. I still had rheum crusting in my eyes. And to think some of my friends are all off to work or even at work as I crept to the kitchen for some coffee. It was a difficult commute to work but at least I got to work in one piece for the daily toll. Got to look at my blog during lunch. I’m such a narcissist when it comes to my blog. lol.

It was another long day and I didn’t have the chance to work on those darn papers. Sometimes I wish I had a large bubble office where I could enter for at least two hours and finish all the paper work and anyone who would attempt to interrupt will just be repelled by its powerful force field.

But these interruptions are part of the work. Sigh.

Got home exhausted and slightly irked by the cab I rode. Cab driver was rude and blamed me for the traffic. The cretin expected me to shell out a tip when my fare  already cost almost thirty pesos more than my usual fare. I offered 15 pesos to round of the fare and expected the propoer change. He rejected it saying he didn’t have the amount for the change and gave me an earful for the lack of consideration. I ended up paying the usual 100 peso fare. Who’s the loser now? Hahaha.

 My bed is calling me. I love those red sheets which I got at SM marikina at 50% off.

I went online to one of my favorite sites, Chuvaness.com and followed the Boyet Fajardo brouhaha.

I’m off to bed but before that I took a shower and quenched my thirst with calamansi juice.

Not quite the real thing but it beats slicing and squirting calamansi. Whoever thought of calamansi concentrate is a Godsend.

 Tomorrow is another day, as always.

Moments in Portraits I - 23 March 2009

It’s quite remarkable how I spend most of the waking moments of my life– WORKING. I’ve been working since I was twenty and with just one year off, I’ve been a slave to the wage for sixteen years.  Darn, that’s freakin’ long.  

Ever since I started my new job as HEA to the head honcho, I’ve been putting in almost fifty hour weeks.  It’s been a busy, quite stressful six months but I’m happy. I’ve been learnig a lot, not only of my job but about myself: my strengths, weaknesses and idiosyncracies. 

However, with all the work, days come by like a blur.  Hence. I decided to chronicle my life in photos and blog about those moments both marvelous and the mundane. Got this idea from my friend Marnz Earlgod. Thanks Marnz.(anddo update your blog, you b*tch!)

March 23, 2009—left work around 6:30 pm. Quite early as Big Brother is off on official business.  Still left with the in-basket still unempty but at least not overbrimming with work.  Spent the last ten minutes before clocking off fixing my  desk–Viola! 

I can’t stand a cluttered desk. lol.

I’m in that classical painting mood, ergo, The Starry Starry Night wallpaper.

Sto. Nino, Hendrich’s photo, and knickknacks.

These papers will be waiting for me tomorrow. Sigh.

And more…double sigh.

Time to call it a day. But before that, I caught a few scenes of Becoming Jane on Star World. Already watched this movie and as always, Jane reminds me so much of myself.

One of the most romantic yet heartbreakingly poignant films I’ve seen this year.

Time for bed now. It’s another day tomorrow.

My 25 Random Things

I’m sure Facebook account holders are familiar with the 25 Random Things About Me chain that’s been spreading like wildfire.  I myself have been tagged several times to answer this chain.  And so on this cool Friday evening, as a sat alone in front of my trusted laptop, I start to ponder on things about me. Blast away…

1. I love taking long hot showers at the end of the day. it’s  my way of washing away not only the grime and pollutants of city life but the stress of working in a quite demanding job.  I feel not only refreshed, but renewed. 

2. I love watching and crying over stories featured in Wish Ko Lang, especially family members who get reunited or people who live in inhumane conditions and were gifted with  a sari-sari store showcase.  It’s like all of them have a new lease on life. 

3. I can only sleep on my bed if the sheets are smooth and tugged tightly to avoid the appearance of creases.

4. I love chocolate, Arce Dairy’s Coffee Crumble, Lay’s Original flavor potato  chips, McDonald’s Caramel Sundae. Even if I’m on a diet, I do not have the will to resist these foods when offered to me.

5. I am a hopeless romantic. I believe in the existence of that one true love, that one person who is your other half, your North, the one being who will make you complete.  To think that one person eludes me to this day saddens me just a little. 

6.  I have never missed a Sunday mass since the start of the year.  That’s one new year’s resolution working to this day.  

7. I dream of someday winning the battle with the bulge.  I realize it’s not impossible.  It is something I can achieve. 

8. I love dressing up even if I’m horizontally-challenged. I love bags, shoes and fashion even if I am not a fashionista. The fact that I’d rather read Marie Claire or any woman’s mag over Time is clear proof. 

9. I get bored when conversations drift to business, finances and mathematics.

10.  I am addicted to sitcoms.  There should be a sitcom channel on cable.

11.  I believe friendships should be hassle-free.  A true friend understands, never demands. 

12.  I tend to giggle when I see actors I adore when watching films or television shows.

13. I don’t have any major life regrets.  Life is too short to wallow on what-could-have-beens.

14. I enjoyed my old career as a teacher but did not consider it my lifelong dream. 

15.  I love engaging in conversations from the serious to the mundane. Talking about mundane things relaxes me. 

16. I love to travel to Europe someday to see great works of art, architecture and historical places. That continent is my dream destination.

17. I love to laugh. Life is definitely better with laughter. 

18. My ultimate high in drinking: 12-13 bottles of beer and still standing. 

19. I easily forgive but find it difficult to forget. 

20. I am non-confrontational. That’s why litigation is not for me. 

21. I dream of growing old and have that one moment in my life where I can look back and declare: It’s been a wonderful life. 

22. My favorite movie is Schindler’s List. I love the part where after typing the list, Itzhak Stern said: “This list… is an absolute good. The list is life. All around its margins lies the gulf.”

23. If ever I feel depressed or something bad happens, I always think of this line from My Best Friend’s Wedding “This too shall pass.”

24. I fear death and people that matter dying. Not because of actually dying but the fact that I won’t see the persons I love EVER again. 

25. Oftentimes when I stare at myself in the mirror or I’m in the john for that very human thing of doing number two, I contemplate on why I ever existed. I mean there was a time in history I was not even here on earth and there will be a time in the future when I won’t exist.  I believe there is a reason for my existence and pray to God that I will find that out before I die.

Stalking Piolo

 Piolo  Pascual is a dreamboat.

I’ve been stalking him these past few months on Cinema One, hoping to catch any of his movies.  So far I have been lucky. I’ve recently watched Milan, Kahit Isang Saglit,  Till There Was You. This Sunday afternoonn, I caught the last quarter of Don’t Give Up On Us and tonight, it’s another Piolo date with Paano Kita IIbigin. Next Saturday, I have penciled in another date with Piolo and Judy Ann with Bakit Hindi Totohanin.   God bless Cinema One!

I usually consider myself a closet Piolo fan. But wonder of wonders, I have been quite vocal about it these past few weeks.  I remember gasping at his huge Bench jeans ad somewhere along Edsa.  Even my nephew Hendrich is getting embarassed by it.  The little boy practically wanted to disown me when I found myself giggling during the National Anthem video at SM Cinema where Piolo appeared in a white shirt, unbuttoned to reveal a white undershirt that hugged the wide breadth of his chest. And just last week, I was grinning from ear to ear when I caught a glimpse of his Max’s Chicken ad during lunch there.  

He’s just such a glorious human being to look at.  I could just imagine letting him sit on top of a stool in his hip hugging jeans and white tee and watch him for hours while I fight the urge to jump his bones. My friend Glads who already met him in person swore that he is the handsomest thing. I mean literally jaw-dropping.  This gave me the nagging idea to just put the jologs-ness aside and troop to ASAP to finally see him in person. Just once.

Watching his movies, I am so moved at what a sensitive actor he is.  I love the way he stares, the way those sad eyes evoke various emotions.  He is the consummate leading man. His movies just has this way of making me sigh and believing in the magic of life and love.

Friends usually know that I’m not into Tagalog films.  But I’m in that cheesy Piolo films phase right now and I’m simply loving it. I just might pass by the mall tomorrow and get my hands on a collection of his films.  

I don’t know why I’m so into him right now. But then who cares? I’m adding Piolo Pascual to my “is love” list.

I’m saying it now. All together now…

Piolo Pascual is love.

He really is.  ^_^

Chanelling Eartha Kitt

I just learned Eartha Kitt died on Christmas Day.

Although there was a tinge of sadness as I have always loved her for being so darn fabulous, I somehow found myself smiling at how she aged so gracefully and lived her life to the fullest.  The woman, even at 81, remained to be alluring, glamorous and every inch the image of the total kitten as she was in her younger years.  I mean, who could ever forget that purr. 

I just saw her in a rerun of The Nanny of the Hallmark Channel, she must be in her late 60s there but still exuded the sexiness that any woman would envy.  She may not, what we call, conventionally beautiful, but by golly, she shines with X-factor that she could seduce anyone with that stare.  

Dazzling…Alluring…Sexy…

I wish I could channel my inner Eartha Kitt.  This may be quite impossible as I do not have that silky, sultry voice.  I don’t have that mesmerizing figure nor I could get away with that purr.  Maybe I could practice the smile, the confidence and the mischievous twinkle in her eye. I could work on it this coming new year. Lol.

Channeling her a little now by listening to some of her songs on my iPod. I shall miss her fabulousness and magic.  

Most especially that catty, seductive purr. 

Rest in peace, Eartha. 

Twilight-Obsessed

Due to the present Twilight mania, a 37-year old lawyer regresses back to a teenager. 

I’m just that, so sue me. 

I watched Twilight for a second time yesterday and at the risk of sounding juvenile, I have joined the scores of teenagers and fully grown women alike who have fallen irrevocably in love with that breathtakingly beautiful vampire.  The fact that he is played by the gorgeous Robert Pattinson fuels the fire of that addiction to blazing heights.  Yes, I found myself like a teenager again, swooning over a character. 

Darn, I thought I have outgrown this.  Apparently not.  

I finally found the time to finish the novel. And after reading it, I had this overwhelming need to see the movie again.  I told myself I was curious of the differences between the movie and the film, or I wanted to visually experience the story again. 

But honestly, really, I just NEEDED to see Edward. 

So I practically dragged my sister and my nephew to see the movie a second time. I had to endure the coldness of the theater as there were fewer viewers, considering that the movie is now on its fourth week here in Metro Manila.  But it was time well spent. My smile reaching practically to my ears and my heart overflowing with giddyness.  It’s a great, great chic flick, the kind that has you swooning to the heavens.  

Honestly, the book is indeed better than the movie because it is an extended and more detailed version of the  romance between Edward and Bella.  It shows the progression of their love affair that one learns to comprehend its depth and the many complications that goes with it.  And while Meyer’s prose is more targeted to the young adult audience (Sweet Dream-y, indeed), I found myself hooked on the plot and the exchange of heart-tugging dialogue.  Edward has a way with words that any woman does not stand a chance not to fall. 

“And so the lion fell in love with the lamb…”

Sigh….

“If I could dream, it would be about you.”

Awwwww…

“You are my life now.”

Waaahh…..

“I love you more than anything in the world combined.”

I love you too…

Nyahahaha.  Too bad a man like that does not actually exist. A true romantic.  Edward is a true romantic. He has the overwhelming power to DAZZLE you and literally sweep you off your feet. 

He is the stuff romantic dreams are made off.  

Sigh.

I am vicariously in love with Edward and Bella, and their complicated love affair.  

So let the regression begin. 

I Heart Edward Cullen

I am in love with Edward Cullen.

Perhaps that may be an exaggeration, especially saying that out loud after watching Twilight.  But I was in complete agreement with my twin sister when she remarked: “Doesn’t that make you want an Edward of your own?”

Hell freakin’ yeah!

I mean, who wouldn’t want a guy with god-like chiseled looks, whose skin glows like diamonds under the brightness of the sun, who protects you with his life and loves you with a passion that is all-consuming it reaches the very fiber of your soul.

Notwithstanding the fact that he has this lustful desire to bite you and drink your blood.  lol.

So he’s a vampire.  Big deal. With that gorgeous face, dark eyes framed with golden flecks and that unnerving smile, he can bite me ANYTIME. 

Not to mention, he saves your life, twice.  Vows to protect you.  Treats you as if you are an intricate part of his immortal life and even watches you with fascination as you sleep.

I must say, Bella didn’t have a chance not faling irrevocably in love with him.  I would to.

Well, in my own fantasy world, I would not hesitate to fall just like Bella. She is lucky to find such a fiercefully powerful love with Edward.  The relationship itself is passionate, seductive and not to mention threading on the edges of danger.  Exciting is indeed putting it mildly. 

But in reality…if in the farfetched possibility that vampires actually exist, would I consider falling in love with one?

Err..hell no.  That would scare the living daylights out of me!

Good thing, Edward Cullen is just plain fiction, like my previous love affairs with Legolas, Mark Darcy and all those fictional characters that I fell in love over the years.

I’m reading Twilight now.  (Good thing my little sister is a fan of the books).  Honestly, the writing is too “Sweet Dreams” for my taste but never mind.  I can’t put it down. I am hooked on Edward Cullen and how irrevocably, poignantly beautiful he is.

Sighs….

HE IS PURE LOVE. ^___^

Credit: Photo from Entertainment Weekly

Sexiest Man Alive

Hugh Jackman is the sexiest man alive.

One look at the People Magazine cover and my jaw dropped, literally. This is simply just one of the few instances when you simply catch your breath and marvel at one of God’s greatest creations.  Gosh, isn’t he simply beautiful ? I could stare into those eyes forever. I could touch that shadow of a beard and be enamored with that scruffy look.  He pulls off the scruffy look quite well.  I sometimes get weak in the knees with a gorgeous man whose face has gone unshaven for days. Makes me want to kiss him silly.  lol.

Gosh, doesn’t that look make you want to peel off that wet grey shirt off of him? And then proceed to “frolic” on the beach with him.  By golly, that lean body is to die for! He could simply give me a stare, a smile and I’d come running.  No questions asked.  He doesn’t even have to know my name.  Lol.

His wife is one LUCKY woman, going to bed every night with that! He looks so darn good, he’s such a great actor and he’s been married to the same woman for twelve years.  Arghhh, I’m in love already. I must get a copy of People!

I’ll be just staring at these photos for awhile.  Forgive me if the drool is apparent.  I just had to write this down and scream to the heavens…

 Hugh Jackman is love.

Thanks to People.com for the photos.

Long Time…

It’s been almost five months since I last posted an entry. Why? A number of things…Work, recreation or the simple reason of not thinking of anything interesting to write about.  I have preoccupied my online time reading other blogs, window shopping on Ebay and downloading stuff.  When I’m not online, I’m at work doing the usual legal stuff, going out, tutoring my nephew and spend the rest of the time marathoning DVDs. 

Hayy let’s face it.  I am UNINSPIRED.  

Too uninspired that I am posting this just to let know to the one or two people who visit my blog…

That I am still alive.

Lol.